by Emmett Smith
THE Following speaks for itself in the light of recent events, in which by all accounts the local “interagency” constabulary got a little too wrapped up in the delights of new technology — at the decided expense of “public safety.” Two officers were badly injured & one apparently rather bewildered civilian died, so now I am just trying to do my part as a citizen & respected community-member (and well-beloved popular local-radio personality!) to prevent any more deaths — with just a little bit! of the kindly old “Grandpa Smith” light touch and a dab of that oldtime Herter-oil on these troubled waters:
27 April 2007
Mankato Free Press,
TO The Editor:
The godawful social problem of biting dogs has come up in the Free Press, and the question is who is responsible for destroying your critter for taking a slice out of somebody? It is said the police should do this job, but their own plates are full already as recent months showed us and anyway it ignores the question, what kind of dog?
On the one hand we have the attack-dogs favored by criminal personalities and other defectives. These are not like grandma’s Fifi, plugged up on chocolates and crabby. Instead they are just four-legged bite-bombs waiting to go off, so who’s to decide?
The police hereabouts are just way too busy right now with trying to avoid any more unnecessary casualties while tarryhooting around the countryside. It seems to be a matter of not getting hurt themselves during their various “interagency” gymkhanas and road-rallyes, plus not killing off too many of the bewildered and other civilians they encounter on the way.
People get sore, forget the police have their own cares (“is my taser-battery getting low?”), shoot back. And so what will happen if an over-enthusiatic cop decides to taser Fifi? Nowadays lots of these grandmas haul around on Harley-Davidsons, plus they are packing and so you can see that awful tragedies are just lying in wait.
But then there remain the judges and their all-important role.
The ones we have here on the bench in Mankato seem to be able to subpoena newspaper-reporters at the drop of a hat and so they must sure know a mad dog when they see it! Anyway, the case is clear to me, Fifi’s fate must remain with the judicial and not the executive branch — and now I know why I prefer cats.
[Emmett R Smith all rights reserved 5 May 2007]