by Bodwyn Wook
The following was forwarded to us here at Bodwyn Wook, by His Excellency The Baron, Unspiek.
The caveat is, of course, that one has seen this wheeze kicking around in the the ‘internet’ for some time now; and, indeed, preceding its most-recent apparition in Rense.com, Mr Jeff Rense’s on-line clipping-service.
For all one knows it it very well may be the ‘real stuff’, too, as the american space-exploration types should say.
An it were so, because of the implicit natural proportionalities adduced, one may only add that it all doth go far, therefore: in verification of the assertions of the anthropic cosmological school; and, most especially so, with regard the ratios between the so-called ‘dimensionless’ constants.
The “True” History Of…Modern American Railroad Tracks
The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That’s an exceedingly odd number.
Why was that gauge used? Because that’s the way they built them in England, and English expatriates built the US railroads.
Why did the English build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that’s the gauge they used.
Why did ‘they’ use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.
Why did the wagons have that particular odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to u se any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads in England , because that’s the spacing of the wheel ruts.
So who built those old rutted roads? Imperial Rome built the first long distance roads in Europe (and England ) for their legions. The roads have been used ever since.
And the ruts in the roads? Roman war chariots formed the initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagon wheels. Since the chariots were made for Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing. Therefore, the United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches is derived from the original specifications for an Imperial Roman war chariot.
Bureaucracies — or their coprolites at any rate! — last forever.
So the next time you are handed a Specification/ Procedure/Process and wonder “What horse’s ass came up with THIS?” you may be exactly right. Imperial Roman army chariots were made just wide enough to accommodate the rear ends of two war horses. (Two horses’ asses!) Now, the twist to the story:
When you see a Space Shuttle sitting on its launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are solid rocket bo osters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at their factory in Utah . The engineers who designed the SRBs would have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line from the factory happens to run through a tunnel in the mountains, and the SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad track, as you now know, is about as wide as two horses’ behinds.
So, a major Space Shuttle design feature of what is arguably the world’s most advanced transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the width of a horse’s ass. And you thought being a horse’s ass wasn’t important? Ancient horse’s asses control almost everything….and postmodern Horses Asses are now the final measure of everything else!
[Emmett R Smith all rights reserved 8 July 2008]